Bad guys are aware of your vulnerabilities.  You should be too.

One of the best ways to become aware of gaps in your defenses is to pretend to be a criminal for one week.  As you go throughout your day at work, at home, at school, and while shopping, pretend to be a criminal.  Watch people and ask yourself “If I were a bad guy, who would I select as a target and why?”.  Doing so will give you insight into your own weaknesses.  Remember that criminals are looking for a victim, not a fight.  They look for someone who is unaware of their surroundings and who will likely not put up much of a fight.

Look for targets of opportunity at home and at work.  Ask yourself “If I were a criminal, how would I break in my house?” or “Where would I hide if I was going to attack someone?”.  Do you routinely leave doors or windows unlocked?  Is there a ladder or tools in your yard that a criminal can either steal or use to break in your house?

After a week of this practice, implement changes in your life to eliminate the gaps in your defenses and make yourself a hardened target.  Walk with force presence, be aware of your surroundings, avoid danger zones, and make sure your home is secure.

Being a bad guy (or at least pretending) has its advantages.

In today’s post, we will look at how to protect your kids from guns.  How would your child react if they found a gun?  The shocking 30 second video below shows what one child did.

Recently, police in Florida offered safety tips for gun owners on their Facebook page.  They encourage all everyone to follow important rules about guns - lock them up, teach the consequences, and explain how to act around guns.   Below is an excerpt from Tampa Bay Newspapers (TBNweekly.com):

Lock it up
People who own guns are advised to keep it locked up, unloaded, and out of reach of children. Store the ammunition separately and keep the ammunition locked up, too, and invest in a trigger lock for the gun, the report said.

Teach that guns kill
Kids may not realize that guns can be deadly. In television shows, movies and video games, violence doesn’t often have consequences. After being shot, a cartoon character may have a hole in his stomach, but it disappears in the next scene, the report said. The leading characters in movies hardly ever die – only the bad guys do. In video games, characters have many lives.

Parents can use these media as a way to teach their children about real life impacts of guns. If you see an example of violence, ask your children what the consequences would be if it happened outside a Hollywood production, the report said. Talk about everyone who is affected by gun violence, such as the victim’s children, parents, friends and community. Discuss the consequences for the shooter and the shooter’s family, such as jail time and guilt.

See full article here

In short, you need to teach your kids about gun safety – even if you do not own a gun.  Practice or talk through some scenarios with your child to make sure they know what to do.

Stay safe and keep your kids safe.

Want to be a victim?  It’s easy and millions of people do it every day . . .  just follow our top 5 tips below.

1. Be completely unaware of your surroundings.  Who cares if someone is following you or getting too close to you at the ATM – it’s unlikely that they’ll rob or hurt you.  Besides, it’s a great way to meet new and interesting people at the police station and the hospital.
2. Frequent places known for fights and high crime.  It’s a great way to see where they film the Cops TV show and get ideas for the opening scene of Law and Order.
3. Keep your doors unlocked and leave your valuables in plain sight.  Locking your door is much too difficult and takes too much time.  I like to leave my valuables out so I remember where they are and so that others can see that I make a lot of money.
4. Drink a lot and be belligerent.  It’s fun and you probably won’t get jumped when you leave the bar.
5. Be submissive and allow strangers to get really close to you – even when there’s no one else around.  It will make it easier for them to shake your hand and it’s unlikely that they have a knife or other weapon.

Remember . . . “Hope” is not a viable self-defense strategy.  Saying “It won’t happen to me” doesn’t make it so.  Stay aware and stay safe.

There’s a tax paid by millions of Americans each year.  It’s not managed by any government and it’s totally optional, yet millions actively contribute.  It’s what I like to call The Stupid Tax.

As the name implies, The Stupid Tax is a tax we pay when we do something stupid.   I first paid the stupid tax when I left my new bike unlocked on my front porch while I ran in the house for a few minutes.  Before I can back, the Tax Collector came by and picked up my bike.

Recently there was an increase in car vandalism in my area.  What was the common factor for each incident?  The owner elected to pay The Stupid Tax by leaving their wallet, mobile phone, GPS, or other goodie in plain view on their seat or dashboard.

How can we combat The Stupid Tax? Reduce the opportunity by making it difficult for the Tax Collector (bad guy).  Remember, crime = victim + opportunity.  When we remove the opportunity, there is no crime.  We can easily reduce the opportunity by locking doors, hiding valuables, and protecting your property.  While we cannot completely eliminate the opportunity, we can make it as difficult as possible for the bad guy so he moves on to an easier target.

Boycott The Stupid Tax – protect yourself.

As indicated in the Warning Signs of Attack article, sometimes it may be appropriate for you to strike first. Obviously, this should be done only if no other option exists and you feel that a preemptive strike is appropriate to defend yourself from an imminent attack. If this is the case, you must make a committed attack. Anything other than a decisive strike will only infuriate the attacker. Once an opening for escape appears, take it. Make sure that your first strike decision is truly based on self-protection – don’t let your ego send you to jail.

When you decide to make a preemptive strike, it is a good idea to reduce the likelihood of criminal charges against you by drawing attention to your situation. Do what you can to attract attention and indicate that you are the victim. This is done using boundary setting and making sure others hear you directing the attacker to “back off”. Witnesses who can clearly identify you as the victim even though you threw the first strike will help protect you from legal problems.

When it comes to defending yourself against an armed attacker, there are three rules.  Of course, the easiest and often best choice is to hand over your wallet or car if that’s what they’re after any you believe you may be injured (or worse) if you don’t comply.  Be sure you do so in a way that creates an opportunity for escape – more on this in a later post.  Money and personal possessions compared to your life and health.

However, if you believe the attacker will injure you or your loved ones even if you comply, you may have no choice but to take physical action against your attacker.  If that’s the case, the following three rules (in the following order) may save your life.

Rule # 1: Get out of the way.  The first and most important rule is to stay away from the business end of the weapon.  If it’s a knife, create distance or find a shield.  For a gun, be aware of the muzzle and where it is pointing, avoiding that direction.  This can include simply getting out of the way or redirecting the weapon.

Rule #2: Control the weapon.  The second rule states that you must always be aware of the weapon and control it or disarm your attacker.  If you simply get out of the way (rule #1) without escaping or controlling the weapon (rule 2), there is nothing stopping your attacker to continue to use the weapon against you.

Rule #3: Control the person.  After you get out of the way to avoid initial injury and control the weapon so that the attacker can no longer use it against you, you can focus your attention on controlling the attacker.  You want to create an opportunity to safely escape and we do this using force against the attacker.   Remember that this person just tried to use a weapon to injure or kill you.  Use whatever force is necessary for you to escape to safety.

The rules must be followed in the above order.  If you try to control the person before controlling the weapon, your odds of survival go down dramatically.  If you try for any type of control before avoiding the weapon, hope you have good health insurance.

Above all, look for opportunities to safely escape.  Better yet, be aware and you can avoid such attacks in the first place.

There’s an old story (which is untrue, by the way) about how to boil a frog. If a frog is placed in boiling water, it will jump out, but if it is placed in cold water that is slowly heated, it will never jump out and will eventually be boiled alive. This moral of this anecdote is that we must be aware of gradual changes around us before it’s too late.

This is the same concept as creeping normalcy. According to Wikipedia, creeping normalcy “refers to the way a major change can be accepted as normal if it happens slowly, in unnoticed increments, when it would be regarded as objectionable if it took place in a single step or short period.” Often the line isn’t crossed all at once. Rather it is the product of a series of small incidents that tested and pushed the line further and further away from what was initially considered ‘normal’.

This is often the case in abusive relationships. Everything starts out great and little by little, the abuser changes. It is done so slowly and in tiny increments that the victim accepts each change as the new normal. Any objection to the change may be met with dismissal (“I’m just kidding”), negating (“you don’t really mean that”) or apology. To outsiders, the change in personality is easily seen because their view of what is normal has not been distorted.

To compare apples to apples once again. we must reset our perception of reality and normalcy. Take the time to mentally find the ideal traits in a person and what societal norms are for such a person. If something doesn’t seem right or your objections are met with the behaviors listed above, the heat may be rising on your bath water and it may be time to jump.

When you are in a physical struggle to protect yourself or the innocent, you must use any advantage at your disposal.  Your attacker will not show you the courtesy of fighting fairly, so you must be able to identify and use anything in your environment as a weapon.  There are generally four types of improvised weapons, although some objects can fit into multiple categories depending on how they are used.  The four types of weapons are: Striking Weapons, Pointed/Cutting Weapons, Distraction Weapons, and Shields.  As you may have guessed, not all weapons are intended to inflict injury on your attacker.  Objects can be used as distractions or to shield yourself from the attack.

Striking Weapons

Objects used as striking weapons are intended to injure the attacker with a sharp blow.  This type of weapon can either be held in the hands or used as a projectile.  Almost any hard, heavy object can be used as a striking weapon (including walls and the ground).  Some common striking weapons include:

Pointed/Cutting Weapons

Objects used as pointed or cutting weapons are intended to injure the attacker by stabbing or slashing/cutting them.  Any sharp or pointed hard object can be used in this manner.  Some common pointed/cutting weapons include:

Distraction Weapons

Objects used as distractions are intended to distract or blind your attacker to create an opening for escape or to set them up for an attack.  Objects may be thrown in the face of the attacker to blind them or thrown in another direction to distract them from your movements.  Some common distraction weapons include:

Shields

Objects used as shields are intended to protect you from the attacker’s strikes and possibly certain weapons.  Almost any sturdy object that can be put between you and the attacker can be used as a shield.  Some common improvised shields include:

Always be aware of how the objects that you carry with you and that are in your environment can be used as weapons.  Your briefcase can serve as both a striking weapon and a shield.  Your belt can be used as a whip or to temporarily blind the attacker.  Your pen can be used to inflict serious damage if you use it to stab your attacker.  If you keep these points in mind and remain aware of your environment, you can gain an advantage that can help you survive an attack.

Remember that your goal is to create an opening and escape.  Just because you have a weapon does not mean that you should engage in a conflict any longer than necessary.  Doing so will only increase your risk.

Self defense includes legal impacts

Part of real self defense is the concept that you must not only be able to physically defend yourself from an attack, you must also avoid successful criminal and civil legal action being taken against you.  Because the legal issues of self defense vary from state to state and depend on individual circumstances, the information below is intended only as a general summary and should not be taken as legal advice.

When are you justified in using force for self defense?  In general, you are justified in using force when and to the extent necessary to defend yourself (or someone else) against the imminent use of unlawful force.  Deadly force (force likely to cause death or great bodily harm) can usually only be used if you reasonably believe that it is necessary to prevent imminent death or great bodily harm to you or someone else.

There are a few tests to determine whether or not the use of force is justified.

1. Ability/Opportunity: The attacker must have the ability to harm you.  You must consider the attacker’s size and strength, number of attackers and whether or not a weapon is used.  You must also consider how close the attacker is to you.  You probably wouldn’t be justified in using force against a small child trying to hit you because it is unlikely they would actually harm you.  Similarly, you wouldn’t be justified in shooting an attacker with a knife that is 50 yards away or behind a locked door.
2. Jeopardy: You must be in immediate jeopardy.  A reasonable person in your place must believe that an attack is imminent and you are in immediate danger.  Verbal threats of future violence against you do not justify the use of force because there is no immediate danger (although the threats may violate other laws).  If you knock an attacker unconscious and continue to strike them, you are no longer using self defense.  Likewise, if a person attacks you and then retreats, you probably wouldn’t be justified in chasing after them and using force because they are no longer a threat.
3. Unavoidable: You must use force only as a last resort.  You should exhaust all other safe options before you resort to the use of force.  If it would be safe to escape, you should do so.  Some states do not require you to retreat.  However, it may be the smart thing to do if it can be done safely.

Even if you pass the above tests and you are justified in using force against another person, you must make sure that the amount of force used is appropriate for the situation.  You are generally only allowed to use the amount of force necessary to stop the attack and prevent harm or death.  Factors such as weapons, size, strength and number of attackers will affect how much force is reasonable.  Besides the legal issues, you should also consider other consequences of using excessive force such as the grief and remorse you may feel if you send someone to the hospital or morgue.

Remember that there is a difference between self defense and fighting.  Fighting is consensual combat.  This means that both parties agree to fight.  The consent can be withdrawn at any time (i.e. by retreating or surrendering).  Once consent is withdrawn, it becomes battery if the other person continues.  If you provoke an attacker, you will find it much more difficult to prove you were acting in self defense.

Using excessive or unjustified force can make you subject to criminal charges (jail time) and civil charges (lawsuits and fines).  To avoid this, follow the above rules and create witnesses whenever possible.  Make sure witnesses know that you are not the aggressor by clear boundary setting and communication (verbal and non-verbal).

You should learn the laws regarding self defense in your area.  However, if you are attacked do not let the legal issues cause you to freeze while you consider the consequences of your actions.  If you consider the issues now, you will be able to act without hesitation if you are forced into a physical defense situation.  The rule of thumb is to use enough force to allow for a safe escape, then escape to safety.

By The Numbers . . .

Friend, Foe or both?

Many violent crimes are committed by family or acquaintances. The table below shows the distribution of violent crimes committed by people that the victim knows vs. strangers. Data is from Bureau of Justice Statistics.

As you can see, many violent crimes are committed by someone the victim knows.  Being with someone you know (as opposed to a stranger) does not ensure your safety.

Always be aware of your surroundings.  Focus on your self-awareness and situational awareness.  If something doesn’t feel right, increase your defensive position and leave.

Regardless of who it is, no one has the right to lay their hands on you against your will.  If they do, they lose the right to be healthy.